Rose #3 Had a Great Saturday

What does it say when your 4-year-old daughter wears more makeup to the mall than you do?

She asked for a bun this morning...and I actually did it! I put her hair up in a high ponytail, twisted her hair around and pinned it up with about a hundred bobby pins:

Isn't it wonderful?

The bun held up quite well all the way to the Mall of America - which WHY did we GO there today? It was an absolute MADHOUSE. Anyway, I digress. Rose #3, her daddy, and I rode the rollercoaster once, then I retired from rides (I think it's happened - I get dizzy on rides now! How can this be?). They rode again, then we spent our last ride points on the carousel:

Rose #2 and #1 were skiing today, so just for a day we felt like we had an only child. It was great (except I missed the other girls...)

Como Conservatory Cousins

Why do we live in Minnesota? I don't know. (That's not true - of course I know. Our families and our histories are here.) On Saturday it was flat out cold, for the eight billionth day in a row, so I took Rose #3 and her cousin to the Como Conservatory. They have a koi pond amongst the flowers. The pond is so dark, you can't see the bottom. Every single time we go near it, I picture my child tumbling over into the pond and me having to jump in. Crunching a few koi bones under my feet, of course.

Luckily nothing like that happened. We just enjoyed the beautiful lily show. Here's Rose #3 posing by the water:

And her cute sweet cousin Kate (NOT KATY) (the crumbs around her mouth may or MAY NOT be donut crumbs. Oh. Yeah, they're donut crumbs):
It is so blissfully warm and humid in the Conservatory that my camera fogged up. I didn't care. I'm posting this picture anyway.

We are currently smack dab in the middle of stomach flu. I would say "barf" but that would hit a little too close to home. So far Rose #3 and Rose #1 have succumbed. I am feeling sort of sickish myself. Psychosomatic? A byproduct of exhaustion? Or a true stomach virus? Only time will tell.

I am the wax in her ears

My Valentine from Rose #2:

Dear Mom,

You are the ice in my water
You are the blood in my body
You are the wax in my ears (WHAT?)
You are the cat in my hat
You are the food I'm eating
You are the water in my ocean
You are the Valentines' that I'm writing
Happy Valentine's Day!

Oh When the Saints!!

Today was Singing Sunday at church, which means that we arrived for 8:15 call and didn't get home until 12:30. That's motherly devotion for you, no? The choir sang "When the Saints Go Marching In," which sounds like kind of a weird song for a Unitarian choir, but it worked. Because it is the day before Valentine's Day, the choir wore red. Here's Rose #1:


And Rose #2:
They love choir. They aren't interested in leaving the house at 8:00 to get to 8:15 call, but they love it once they're there. I can't wait for the day when Rose #3 is in choir too - then all three of them will be singing!

Chalice Lighter

Rose #1 is a Chalice Lighter. This is a really neat program at church where kids grades 3 - 6 participate in the worship service by lighting the chalice. She was "invested" as a Chalice Lighter a couple Sundays ago. Here she is smiling in the pew after the investiture. She has her Chalice Lighter pin on:

Two of the other girls that went through the program with her, Tess and Gwyneth, possed for a picture next to the, well, chalice!

This was one of the days I really wish my mom was still alive. She would have loved to see Rose #1 invested as a Chalice Lighter. I remember the day that I joined our church as a member; she was so proud and happy.

I have an observation to make about death, or more precisely about the sympathy that people express to you when a family member dies. They say: Your memories will sustain you. Or, Aren't we lucky we had as much time as we had with her. Or, Your mother will always be with you.

That's bulls**t. Memories don't sustain you. Yeah, maybe we're lucky we had that much time, but hell, I wanted more time. And one more comment: aren't I supposed to be able to feel my mother's presence in my life? Like feel her hand guiding me or her love in my heart? I have news for you - I got nothing. A big, fat, nothing.

Cat Bean

My Rose #1. We also call her Bean. I told her to get ready for bed tonight; to which she immediately replied "No." I told her then that it would be really nice if her response wasn't always "no" when I tell her to do something.

She said that she was getting ready to be a teenager, as if she needs years of practice. She did also note that she was doing her getting ready early.

Great.